why not?

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the time of my life

I really hope this year i'll change into a better one. I really hope.

ya Allah, I want to be a better student, a better friend, a better daughter, and a better person that will be close to You. All I can do is try, the rest is Yours. Amiin.

woohee! it's just me finally!

it feels great. awesome. yeah, i can't deny that it feels a liiiiitle tiny bit sort of............. umm... quite? haha. what ever. but it feels good. though i know that this will be change in not-for-so-long time haha but i want to enjoy this situation. hh.

btw, just in these few months, LOTS of things changed. ever since the ninth grade. haha, well there's a thing that changed (really really really changed), and that's impact me much. wkwkw but don't worry, i'm ok. (HAHAHA you're such an over confident that there will be someone who cares?)

ooo almost forgot. this is september! wahoo.
here are some of my september wishes. i hope it will happen. and i hope yours to :))

• i want a fisheye cam
• various lunch
• i can think positively and not worrying for almost everything -_-"
• good grades
• be a good friend
• no more creepy expressions -_-
• stay calm hahahaha (no. seriously. i really hope this one works)
• stay healthy

well. those are some for now. ttyl people, byeo!

not the matter of time

do you know what relief means? ahh.... i do now. hahah. i'm happy to be relief :D my mom's right! go positive! heheh. well, i'm not gonna tell you why am i feeling relief right now, it's a really really long story cause it contains more than 10 years story :p hehehe. ah well, but i'm glad everything's clear now. it was all my self who built the mind cage, thought that everything will change. wk, well, things change, but not ALL of them. :))
you know what? i just read http://www.tadzakira.blogspot.com 's post, made remember my elementary life :( i miss all of my friends............ especially the one who's now in senior high school, she's my best friend and also my family, (she really is my family, we have family ties though hehe) i remember, when the first time i went to high school, i had no friend, though i was a new kid, and nobody from my elementary went to my high school. and i wished i will have some friends like her at this high school....
and what i wished is now comes true... i have best friends, they are all kind, and they are beyond than what i wished:))

this is my last year in junior high school, and now i want to have friends like them in my senior years. and the most important thing, i want to stay best friends with them and her for
....ever! heheh amiin :)

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sophomore

tadi gue liat di web orang ada yang nulis,

"the more i said i don't
mind
the more i care.
the more i said i've move
on
the more i pretend i
forget"

wih, dalem tuh. haha. gue jadi inget beberapa taun yang lalu, gue bener2 drama queen. yah, sebenernya sekarang juga masih, tapi mendingan. mau main persenan? yah, kira2 20% perubahannya (oke sotoy tapi yah, kurang lebih)

dulu gue kalo gasuka sesuatu, nangis. sekarang cuma tampangnya cemberut, tapi gue gapuas, gue pengenya kalo gasuka datar, malah senyum. amin. haha.

gue tau gue perfeksionis, udah ada yang bilang. trus gue berkaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaali kali bilang gue harus berubah tralala trilili gamau diatur orang lain (kecuali keluarga gue) tapi ujung2nya, kalo udah ketemu orang2 lain itu, BYAARR lupa deh omongan gue sebelumnya, tetep aja diatur orang, tetep aja nurut kalo orang lain bilang gue harus ini harus itu. cheesy? i must admit, yes.

jadi inget, gue pernah punya masalah yang bener2 gue gasuka, gue nangis,
didepan orang2 banyak. itu malu2in banget, tapi ya itu gue yang dulu.
setelah gue nangis, diantara orang2 banyak itu tadi, ada yang bilang,
"kalo gue jadi lu sih, gue becandain
aja"
mungkin kesanya ngegampangin, apalagi buat such a drama queen like me, how
come?
tapi coba pikir lagi, yang diomongin dia bener juga lho, ngapain dibikin
pusing kalo gapengen pusing? ya ga? sekarang gue jadi mikir, how ridiculous i
was?!
orang tadi mungkin ga sengaja ngomong kaya gitu, tapi apa yang dia omongin,
gue bersyukur banget punya temen kayak dia. kalo gue pikir2, dia itu anaknya
easy going banget. kalo ada masalah, yah, jangan disesalin, selesein. gabisa? ya
udah, akuin gabisa, abis itu, belajar jangan sampe keulangin lagi. dia juga
anaknya jujur sama dirinya sendiri, dia gamau & gasuka, ya dia ga lakuin
walopun orang lain maksa dia. ya ngapain ngerjain sesuatu yang lu ga pengen? ga
penting pula. wasting time. woy, thanks ya, i hope i can learn from you
more.

sekarang gue mau get real, gue tau gue a loud girl, yah, kalo mau jadi kalem pasti butuh waktu. sekarang gue mau jadi gue yang biasa aja, tapi ga kaya dulu lagi. i want to be better, but still me.

oh ya btw, sekarang kan tanggal 15 Agustus, HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOSEPH ADAM JONAS!!! wish you all the best trus kapan kau kesekolah ku? keburu un niih. mungkin pas sma/kuliah?? haha just kidding joe! wkwkw

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bit too much of those

my junior sent me Nick And The Administration's Who I Am last night... it got great instrument though, haha. it's my habbit that if i listen to a song, and i sorta like it, i'll search for the lyric. so i did search the lyric of this Who I Am song, and it said,

"I wanna someone to love me for who I am"

hahaha, and i was sorta thinking, this is soo me. hah, i know it sounds a bit cheesy, but i was thinking that way -_-"
okay, but i realized then, hey! i do have someone to love me for who i am. oops better! i have LOTS of people to love me for who I am :)) It's like what else? i've got everything! didn't mean to be show off or some kind of that, but that's life! it's like Allah have already give us EVERYTHING. but we, humans, just can't get enough. always ask for more. so do i. from now on, i'll try to be a more thankful person :) hihi wish me luck ;) and btw, tomorrow is the holy Ramadhan that we love :D

I'm sorry for all of my misbehave to you guys................................................
let's start a new page! have a happy Ramadhan guys :D

so close but so far away and there's nothing to blame

when i infront of you i'm like turning into a poker face.
i didn't mean to be a poker face, i really didn't!! otherwise, i want to be fun to you.
really sorry..............................
i hope i can be fun :)

IXG2011!

halu semuaa~ ada peningkatan niih haha di kelas sekarang gue lebih banyak ketawanya (lagian kapan si gue ga cekikikan -,-) dari pada tidurnya. yep. itu bagus karena kelas 9 kalo gue tidur di kelas bakal rugi oooh kelas 9 gitu! haha

iya jadi gue di cap ratu alay sama temen2 gue. yah, mau nolak juga gimana? kerjaan gue ngeledekin tu anak2 pada pake bahasa g4uLs. contohnya teman samping bangku gue kemaren gue tulisin tulisan2 kreatif (baca : tak terbaca oleh orang awam hahaha) di mejanya. untungnya dia tidak keberatan. mwahahaha
yah, jadi kalo temen gue bilang gue naQ alay, gue jawabnya : alay itu kreatifitas dalam berbahasa, boleh dong?
yah, walopun sebenernya alay jangan sampe di pake pas un. bisa bahayhay itu.
tapi kata si amber, tingkatan alay gue jauh kalah sama bahasa alay masyarakat tertentu yang namanya tidak bisa disebutkan disini karena itu privacy mereka. ya ga? hiks, padahal gue udah sering bikin orang2 pada ga ngerti tulisan gue.. ternyata ada yang lebih jago.. hYkZS hiKZSdchdxzhsh.,.,,.,.,.,,,,,,??!!
oya, satu lagi, gue kan emang seneng belajar foreign language. dan mungkin alay adalah salah satu bahasa foreign language.

trus aduh gue ga tau tapi sepertinya anak 9G punya hobi yang sama : tertawa h4h4h4.... yah, sebenernya itu sih hobi hampir semua orang, tapi di 9G gue menemukan memang sepertinya tertawa adalah hobi haha. eiya tau ga, gue sampe nanya loh sama sepupu gue yang anak psikologi tentang intensifitas (salah ga tuh bahasanya? wk) gue dalam tertawa. katanya malah bagus, biar awet muda. oh iya, tertawa disini bukan seperti orang2 yang di RSJ atau mereka2 yang sering berkeliaran dengan senyuman pada tiang listrik yah, tertawa kami2 ini ada dasarnya loh, dan tidak sampai yang over atau apa, yah, biasa saja tapi mantap.
hemb. mungkin itu juga salah satu reason why gue jadi jarang tidur di kelas. baguslah wk.

dan kelas kami yang imyut di ujung gedung (?) ini sudah melakukan 3 ulangan dalam minggu ke 3 kami di kelas kiyudh ini. minggu besok sudah ada waiting list satu ulangan lagi di hari kamis dan banyak waiting list pr. hope we'll finish those tasks beautifully (?) sampe un. amiin :)

tick tock time goes, will i just stand here and waiting for something that might not happend? oh no no, i wanna live don't wanna stuck in old memories and i will make my future better than now yup, you'll see~

starting my own

you are the one who started. and i think now you're the one who finished it. so can now i start my own? so i can finish my own? please?

interest?

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haluu semuaa how are you? fine? great! cause i'm as well wk okeh sepupu gue ntar minggu depan insya Allah mau ada acara ketemu astronot malaysia.

OMG mauuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu.

tau ga, gue jadi keingetan obsesi gue pas sd : jadi astronot ato ngga ahli astronomi. aw pengen bgt gue waktu itu. abis itu gue dulu ampyun fans berat jepang. aa ampe artis2, band2, seiyuu, yah, pengen jadi semacem otaku gitu deh. ampun gue jadi inget. seiyuu favorit gue : mamoru yang jadi seiyuu di gundam oo... trus band yang gue suka itu band nya hikaru, hey say jump!
aaa gue suka sama gitu2annn kerorolah, minami sisters, miiko, ken hirai, banyak bgt ampun.

sekarang?

gue ngikutin orang lain. soalnya gue mikir, hiks, orang2 disekitar gue jarang yang suka, kalo gue ngomongin gue kayak freak apaan tau ngomongin jepang sendiri yang lain jarang yang nanggepin. haha gue gak nyalahin temen2 gue, nggak, definately not. malahan gue makasih gue jadi bisa ngebuka mata gue buat hal2 yang lain...

mmm well but i have a confession, following other's interest is so blah! blah blah and will be more blah. i'm OFF. cape gue sok2 suka2 kayak anak lain biar bisa fit in doang but actually, i don't have any passion for that. selama ini gue mikir, gue pengen bisa ngomongin hal2 yang gue suka tapi gue takut ga di tanggepin... takut malah disangka freak, takut malah disangka sok2an gitu.. oh ngapain sih gue selama ini su'udzon?

WASTING TIME DUUUH.

gue kasih tau ya ke kalian, daripada kalian juga kejadian kayak gini, mendingan kalian ikutin apa yang kalian suka. kalian juga kalo punya temen yang interstnya beda dan dia lagi cerita tentang interestnya itu (good interests ya tapi) jangan kalian kata2in interest temen kalian itu, atopun jangan misalnya nih, temen kalian punya interest di bidang jait2an, trus kalian kalo lagi ngumpul bareng temen2 kalian bilang "eh si S itu apa2 jait2 muluuu ck dia mah gila jait" well itu sebenernya a little thing, but big effect loh. si Snya itu bisa2 mikir gini : "eh? gue salah ya suka jait? kok tadi dia bilang kayak gitu? mm kayaknya jait gak diterima deh. gue gak jait lagi aja kali ya?"

yah, kalo kalian mungkin punya big confident, tapi yang lain? belom tentu... dan kita kan harus respect sama yang lain... ya kan? haha
but, nothing's too late!

hello (again) japan and astronomy!

15

umur gue gak 15. tapi gue kemaren baca majalah, ada cewe, gayanya sih kayak umur 16-17, tapi ternyata dia 15. ups, gue ngeliatnya kaget, karena gue mikir, OMG, cuma beda setaun ama gue ko gede bgt ya? tapi gue mikir lagi, UPS juga, gue gak umur 7 tahun lagi. umur gue emang udah wajar kalo gayanya kaya gitu, malah emang biasanya anak seumuran gue dan seumuran orang itu gayanya gitu.
ampun deh, gue baru sadar lagi gue udah bukan anak sd lagi... gue kelas 9... perasaan gue kalo ngeliat anak umur 16 taun tuh udah gede bgt, trus sekarang gue sering bengong2 ngeliat anak2 seumuran gue yang bergaya seperti anak besar dan memang mereka anak besar dan gue seumuran sama mereka.
jiwa anak kecil gue masih di gue nih -,- haha serius. kalo ngeliat anak 15 taun yang gayanya anak gede bingung sendiri gue ntar mikir : "ih dia gayanya ga kaya umurnyaa" trus ntar keingetan "eh ngga deng dia kan 15 taun, wajar gayanya begituu. eeeeeh! gue cuma beda setaun! gaya gue??"

haha semoga sekarang gue sadar kalo gue udah kelas 9, bukan kelas 5 lagi.